Fig leaves
were Adam and Eve’s first choice after sin entered the Garden of Eden, and ever
since man and woman have always had questions on what to wear and what not to
wear.
When I observe some of the fashion trends among believers today – tops with lengthy slits, leggings that hug the
body, unbuttoned shirts, low neck lines, sleeveless dresses with large arm
holes, low-rise pants, see-through clothing, a bared midriff and back... I begin to wonder: Has not the world succeeded
in squeezing us into its mold contrary to the will of God
revealed in Romans 12:2 where we are exhorted ‘not to be conformed to this
world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind’.
Many
sincere young men and women are clamoring for a set of clear guidelines on
what is right and what is not.
Fashions
keep changing from time to time and from place to place. What may be modest and
appropriate at one place and time may be wholly offensive at another. Whatever
is the ‘IN’ thing today is ‘OUT’ tomorrow. There is no way we can keep up with
the Jones-es in the world of fashions as the trends keep swinging from one
extreme to another. Like a pendulum the length of tops swing from short to long,
and the width bottoms from Afghan baggies to skin fits. What then are the ground rules to be followed?
First, there ought to be a decided modesty in
dress: In 1 Timothy 2:9 Paul says: ‘I also want women to dress modestly,
with decency and propriety.’ This is a biblical injunction. John Stott says, ‘What Paul is emphasizing is that Christian
women should adorn themselves with clothing, hairstyles and jewelry which in
their culture are inexpensive and not extravagant; modest and not vain; chaste
and not suggestive.’
We eat for
ourselves, but we dress for others: It is others who see us most. We see
ourselves only in the mirror. Others are continually making value judgments about us by what we have chosen to wear. While the statement – ‘A man is what
he wears’ is not wholly true, it is true that what we choose to wear makes a
statement about ourselves: our values, our intentions and even our character.
Our dress style should reflect values such as modesty, moderation, decency,
propriety, simplicity, practical utility, comfort and stewardship of time and
money.
Second, we must learn to dress for the
occasion: Moderation involves – not lagging far too behind the trends of the
day, nor always sporting the latest trend in town. But let us also not forget
that we are called to be different – to be counter culture, not conforming to
this world but being transformed by the values that are given to us in the
Scriptures. If you are to be at a meeting of the Board of Directors of a
corporate office, follow the dress code – be there in your executive best. But
if you are at a sea side resort on holiday it goes without saying that you would
choose casuals. We must be dressed such that our dress doesn't catch special
attention – either by being too outlandish or by being too inappropriate. If no
one takes special notice of you – then, it is probably the best indication that
you are truly dressed for the occasion. On the other hand if many are taking
special notice of what you have chosen to wear – then maybe you have made a
mistake!
Third, we must be careful to ensure that our
dressing does not lead others to sin: You may never have intended that the
dress you have chosen to wear should lead someone else to sin. But the purity
of your motive does not cancel the effects of your appearance. In Luke 17:1-2 Jesus said to
his disciples, ‘It is impossible but that occasions of stumbling should come.’
In other words, the world being what it is, the human heart being what it is,
occasions of stumbling are almost inevitable. ‘But woe unto him, woe unto her through
whom they come. It were well for him, for her, if a millstone were hanged about
his neck and he were thrown into the sea rather than that he should cause one of
these little ones to stumble.’ The little ones are those who believe in him. Romans 14:13 says: ‘Let us
not, therefore, judge one another anymore, but judge this rather, that no man,
no woman, put a stumbling block in his brother’s way or an occasion of
falling.” That is what we are to judge. Am I in any way in the manner of my
dress putting an occasion of stumbling before one of my brothers or sisters in
Christ?
Fourth, the Scripture (Deuteronomy 22:5) clearly
forbids transvestism - the practice of wearing the clothes of the opposite sex.
So we must make sure that the male-female distinctive is not lost in what we
choose to wear.
Finally, we
must welcome controls: Seek genuine feedback on the modestly and appropriateness of your dress from godly
others, your parents or your spouse. Parents must know that they have
every right while their children are under their roof to insist on modest
dressing. They must stand the ground and tell the son or daughter, ‘While you
are under our care, this is simply not permissible. No discussion. End of the
issue.’ This generation of young people cannot stand against the tremendous
pressure on them to compromise and be insensitive to the biblical standards of
modesty. They may have to learn to simply tell their peers, that certain styles
are just not permitted by their parents.
We must cultivate
a sensitive, well instructed conscience before God concerning the choice of
your dress and our stitching styles. If you realize that you have made mistakes
in the past in the inappropriate choice of your dressing styles, repent and
bring forth the fruit of true repentance. Make the necessary changes in your
wardrobe.
Lest I be misunderstood: I am not
trying to rob you of your Christian liberty. I am not advocating that you go
out dressed covered from head to toe in a robe with only two eye holes for you
to see. But I am determined that we need to be decidedly modest for the glory
of God. Let me also make it clear that in our outreach meetings and cell groups
we will not say to those whom we invite: ‘You can’t come in here and listen to
our gospel dressed like that,’ No. We would welcome them exactly as they show
up, but that doesn't mean that we need to compromise on the biblical principles
ourselves in order to win them.
Post Script: A more detailed article on the
subject of drawing lines on modesty in dress can be seen at the author’s blog: http://maturityfoundation.blogspot.com (Blog
Post dated: 8th June 2010)
